Anaggh // I do not claim to be the originator of the collections here. It is just my attempt to liven up LIFE which is in any case too serious. There is no discrimination - racial or otherwise involved. If you see something you do not like, please feel free to move on!
Ash as never seen before........wow!
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A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural North Cowra . He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell int o a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it." The old farmer Peter replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here." The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial lawyers in Australia and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own." The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we settle disputes in North Cowra . We settle small disagreements like this with the 'Three Kick Rule.' The lawyer asked, "What is the 'Three Kick Rule'?" The Farmer replied, "Well, because the dispute occurs on my land, I get to go first. I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and so on back and forth until someone gives up." The lawyer quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom. The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the attorney. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel-toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees!
His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth. The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his rear end, sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie. Summoning every bit of his will and remaining strength the lawyer very slowly managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, you old fart. Now it's my turn." (I love this part) The old farmer smiled and said, "Nah, I give up. You can have the duck." When you are educated, you'll believe only half of what you hear. When you're intelligent, you know which half.
| A mother and father take their 6-year old son to a nude beach. As the boy walks along the sand, he notices that many of the women have boobs bigger than his mother's, so he goes back to ask her why. She tells her son, 'The bigger they are, the sillier the lady is.' The boy, pleased with the answer, goes to play in the ocean but returns to tell his mother that many of the men have larger things than his dad does. She replies, 'The bigger they are, the dumber the man is'.
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A man is busy having sex with his girlfriend on the railway tracks.
The alert train driver spots the couple miles before and immediately starts hooting and starts applying the brakes, but the couple just ignores it and is happily in the act.
The driver is damn irritated and just stops a few yards away from the loving couple.
He jumps down from the engine and rushes towards the man who has just finished and is zipping up his pants.
The driver is so angry, he starts shouting at the irresponsible young man, "You idiot, do you realize that if I had not seen you at the right time, this would have been your last..."
“Hold on” replies the young man. “Listen, you were coming; she was coming and I was coming... But only you had the brakes...”..
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Two old drunks are sitting in a bar when the first one says,"Ya know, when I was thirty and got an erection, I couldn't bend it, even using both hands. By the time I was forty, I could bend it about ten degrees if I tried really hard. By the time I was fifty, I could bend it about twenty degrees, no problem. I'm gonna be sixty next week, and now I can bend it in half with just one hand." "So," says the second drunk, "what's your point?"
"Well, I'm just wondering how much stronger I'm gonna get."
It is the month of August, on the shores of the The hotel proprietor takes the 100 Euro note and The butcher takes the 100 Euro note, and runs to The hooker runs to the hotel, and pays off her The hotel proprietor then lays the 100 Euro note At that moment, the tourist comes down after No one earned anything. However, the whole town is And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how the United
Black Sea. It is raining, and the little town
looks totally deserted. It is tough times,
everybody is in debt, and everybody lives on
credit.
Suddenly, a rich tourist comes to town. He enters
the only hotel, lays a 100 Euro note on the
reception counter, and goes to inspect the rooms
upstairs in order to choose one.
runs to pay his debt to the butcher.
pay his debt to the pig grower.
The pig grower takes the 100 Euro note, and runs
to pay his debt to the supplier of his feed and
fuel.
The supplier of feed and fuel takes the 100 Euro
note and runs to pay his debt to the town's
prostitute that in these hard times, gave her
"services" on credit.
debt with the 100 Euro note to the hotel
proprietor to pay for the rooms that she rented
when she brought her clients there.
back on the counter so that the rich tourist will
not suspect anything.
inspecting the rooms, and takes his 100 Euro note,
after saying that he did not like any of the
rooms, and leaves town.
now without debt, and looks to the future with a
lot of optimism.....
States is doing business today.
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